Monday 23 February 2009

has he come to acceptance?

Date: 26 June 2007
To: DNB Group
Subject: re: Depression - has he come to acceptance?

no.

he says: "i should have gone to counselling about Ix before" - i
say, it isn’t too late. do it now. talk to the psychologist.

going to a support group - not really - and dads he have met have all been
working. ("they can cope, why not me? poor me?")

last nite:
" i think this is punishment from God because we didn’t get married
before Ix was born"

"i must be a really bad person for "this" to happen to me" - jeez, i
told him he wasn’t a bad person - after all the logic makes me a bad
person too....told him to talk to his priest....

why didn't we marry - oh just didn't happen, i wasnt bothered either
way...., would have done if he had pushed it... now i am happy to in a way, to provide security for the children -
(tax reasons?) but not miserably, just the two of us and the priest,
as N wants -

if we get married i want to celebrate our wonderful, imperfect,
complex, family and invite my children and close friends and family.
have a children's entertainer and bouncy castle. DVD playing lazy town
in the corner for Ix....you know.

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